Sunday, 31 May 2009

Pervertables.

Hello! Bet you've forgotten I was even a co-host here, right? Long time no etc etc.

Afraid I don't have anything too profound right now, more practical: lifestyles of the cheap and kinky: Discuss.

That is:

After a long dry spell, am easing back into actually y'know -doing- stuff. Unfortunately my cupboard's been rather bare apart from two floggers. And the specialty stores are, well? Expensive.

So the other day I went to the friendly local hardware/miscellaneous dry goods store, and picked up:

a couple of wooden spatulas, one with slats, one without;

a long wooden brush meant for cleaning out barbecues or something;

bag of wooden clothespins;

ostrich "quill" plume.

Total cost: About as much as one small "novelty" item would've been at Good Vibes or one of the local boys' toys shops. They should work fine, too. Great thing about SF: discreet "testing" of such items against ones thigh in a non-speciality shop doesn't raise an eyebrow. In fact there was a gentleman in the aisle who was getting assistance from one of the employees fitting a chain around his neck.

Am now wondering: what else? Anyone have any ideas? Common or not so common householdy items one can use for nefarious purposes? Seriously, that store's a treasure trove if you know what you're looking for.

46 comments:

Miss Unconventional, the Boss Goddess said...

Ah, you listed all the things that I had initially listed.

How about a broom stick too?

belledame222 said...

Bit unwieldy I'd have thought. also would have to be a well-made one...

I've heard people suggest things like wooden skewers, and I did look at these small bamboo skewers they had, like 100 to a pack for 2 bucks, but it was like...okay, sharp pokey thing, poke poke. Now what? I mean...*poke.* Maybe it'd do something for someone, or maybe I'm just not being imaginative enough, I dunno. I've never gotten much out of those Wartenberg wheels either as far as that goes. but at least they -roll.-

also: do I -need- *100*?

on a similar note was musing if it were possible to do anything interesting with those miniature whisks/eggbeaters.

considered the rubber spatulas as well.

Those little sparkly hair clips they sell in the drugstore? can be -wicked- painful.

belledame222 said...

mild sensation tools are all over the place: loofah-gloves, say, if you can bear the O'Rly association.

Clarisse Thorn said...

Banjo picks. A dollar apiece and you can scratch the hell out of someone.

EthylBenzene said...

Bamboo back scratcher. The kind that looks like a hand at the end? Stingy! I have this problem of getting distracted in Williams Sonoma about all the lovely pervertables there in fact.

Trinity said...

"loofah-gloves, say, if you can bear the O'Rly association."

O GOD O GOD CANNOT UN-IMAGINE.

D:

Alexandra Erin said...

Well, I can get a lot of mileage out of any kitchen implements, but that speaks to the direction of my specific fetish more than anything else. :P Give me a partner with a basting brush and some barbecue sauce or cooking oil and I'll be happy as the proverbial hog. A little "Whisk Awareness Consensual Kink" wouldn't go amiss, either.

In terms of more general BDSM play... I've got a ruler I'm especially fond of. Twelve inches of punishment... and traditional, too. Seconding the backscratcher suggestion, too.

me and not you said...

My understanding of bamboo sticks is that you can use them like clothespins for the pinchy. Lets say, easy peasy nipple, right? bamboo stick on either side plus rubber band...

I imagine that it a lot of work for *nipples*, but for lips and other longish body parts, you could get a wide pinch area that you can get with more traditional pinchy things.

ggg_girl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ggg_girl said...

I like thin needles, my boyfriend picks up 30 gauge needles in lab (they are very thin).

regular white candles are nice (colored ones can burn at higher temperatures because of colored additives)

hmmm... you could make an ice dildo or something more complicated@me&notyou
I've use chopsticks as clamps this way too.

thene said...

I was going to recommend ice. Lots of sensation, no cost.

One odd one I'm into: using large strawberries as gags. And telling someone/being told that you're not allowed to bite down on them without permission. :)

Mighty Fast Pig said...

Hairbrushes, the kind with a handle, are good for both impact and friction

Saran wrap is good for bondage and mummification

Bandanas or handkerchiefs for blindfolds and gags

Dowels or other wood or plastic rods for impact.

Myca said...

For me, my cheap-o spreader bar has been a lifesaver.

Thick wooden dowel
Two screw-in eyebolts.
Two of those hardware clip things to clip restraints in place.

It works totally well. It's not the prettiest, but it also cost me less than $5, total.

I wish I could remember the proper name for the double-sided hardware clip things. Grr. What is cool about them si that if you're restrainign someone ins a stress position, and their wrists, ankle, etc, won't quite reachm you can just add more of the clips to extend things by a couple inches at a time.

---Myca

SnowdropExplodes said...

I'm hugely thankful for the sewing machine I got at a charity shop for the equivalent of about $20 US money. It means that I get to make my own bondagewear out of cheap offcuts from the sewing shop!

I also had a ruined pair of trousers that I'm now cannibalising into a pair of shorts and an arm binder using the sewing machine!

Silk scarves are always a good one for bondage/sensation play.

For gag purposes, you can probably do a lot with a large plastic dog toy bone, and some rope or somesuch.

Luggage belts are quite good (especially if you can get one with a combination lock) I think you can get them quite cheaply nowadays (I have one in my box of BDSM goodies).

I found in the local countryside a long piece of willow twig (about 4ft long) - after treating it with disinfectant, sanding it down and sealing it with linseed oil, it now makes an excellent whippy beating toy!

ggg_girl said...

oooh I love the idea of a dog bone gag!

Orlando C. said...

Since we live in East Bumblefuck and don't shop online, we are pretty much entirely on the pervertable system. Although I work in the engineering/artesan field, so things are a bit easier.

But, in terms of intensity for low-cost? Wooden spoons, which I'm sure hurt more than any of those fancy paddles y'all city people buy, and ice dildoes.

THE EASY-PEASY ICE DILDO

Unroll a condom inside a toliet paper tube. Fasten in place with a rubber band. Fill with water. For bonus points, add a popsicle-stick handle, so the poor dom(me) doesn't hurt his/her little hand. Freeze. Slowly be fucked into screaming, drooling madness.

Also....in the agrarian countryside, at least, such things as chains and hypodermic needles don't raise suspicion.

Anonymous said...

curtain rods make wicked canes.

anarchafemme said...

Hmm, beyond what everyone else already said:

On the absolutely no cost front, old bike inner tubes can be easily turned into very stingy floggers.

I've also made floggers out of rope, but those are less than impressive, at least for me.

Anonymous said...

Had a friend who salvaged a leg cast into some pretty awesome impact play stuff. Anything shaped suitably with velcro can be great for impact play.

belledame222 said...

me and not you: aha! that does make sense, thanks. -makes note-

belledame222 said...

thene: oh, I like that one. variation: chocolate covered strawberry...

belledame222 said...

MFP: yeah, I used to have a great old fashioned wooden hairbrush, was gutted when realized I lost it in the move.

saran wrap, willow/other branches found in Nature, yup. dog bone & curtain rod: nice ones!

belledame222 said...

ha, OC, heard of ice dildos, never considered an ice dildo -popsicle.- nice.

rozele said...

seconding anarchafemme on the endless uses of bike tubes (available for the asking at most bikeshops)... cut 'em up into strands for sting; fold 'em over for thud; punch holes in 'em and use shoelaces to turn them into restraints (don't go too tight - engaging the stretch too much is a bad idea); etc etc.

you can also find all manner of long, thin rubber and plastic things at the hardware store: i once found some 1/2" diameter tubing with a very narrow hole in the middle, three lengths of which became a lovely object somewhere between a multi-cane and a very stiff 3-strand flogger.

oh, and don't underestimate what can be done with the little file inside a nail-clipper.

seitzk said...

I collect these long whippy rubbery things that basically are their own genre of stingy, but are found in nature as anything from a child's gag pencil to a sparkly plastic toy necklace to the loopy end of a shoehorn. Shoehorns! Also nice as paddles.

Clothespins - so very cheap.

Those wooden skewers are really good for flicking, actually - if long enough, they can replace those "evil stick" things. They're really nice on the genitals.

subversivesub said...

@anarchafemme -- re: rope floggers, have you tried putting knots in each of the falls (spacing them out a few inches apart from each other)? That adds a bit of sting and can leave some nasty bruises. I *love* it when my partner alternates between a knotted rope flogger and a bike tube flogger, the contrasting sensations are really awesome.

spokewench said...

mmmm... bike tube toys.

I explored some uses of sewers + rope here.

A package of 200 seems like a lot at first, but the sharp parts get worn down if you use them much for poking, so you'll find yourself getting through them.

I have also tied a handful together and used it for hitting, it sounds like a percussion instrument though the sensation is very gentle. Also just one at a time as a thin cane kind of thing, though the ones I have are only bout 11 inches long so they don't have much force behind them. (hmmmm are there longer ones....?)

I got some leather clothing to cannibalize at a church clothing swap for $1 or $2 apiece.

Don't forget you can do a whole scene with just your hands, they are very versatile. :)

SadieT said...

Theres a guy holding out a plastic bathbrush and bending over in his rose pink full brief nylon panties inviting a spanking. He begs and dares women to copy and share the panty photos so I did at http://www.embarrassmisterpanty.blogspot.com/ along with the URLs of the web pages where he posted al the free panty photos of himself in his nylon full brief ladies panties-modeled-back-view. In the last panty photo on the Free Panty Photos page he's holding out a long handled wooden bath brush 15 and a half inched long and 7.7 ounces made by Pacific Image Inc. Mister Panty, as Panty Buns sometimes calls himself, posted the URL where it's available in the comments to the attachment to the panty photo. You can get a good look at the Bath Brush at http://www.pacificimageinc.com/product.asp?prodid=135 . He 's admitted to wanting a severe spanking with it. I think a wire coat-hanger, flexible thin electrical extension cord, black rubber bungee, are good. Jumper cable clamps are a bit severe. Hot sauce or pureed jalapeno peppers are good. I think nail polish remover is too severe and not safe. Maybe some pepper spray for lubricant or is that too severe? Those long plastic adjusting rods on Levelier (sp?) venetian blinds can be removed and make a wicked cane. They can be put back in normal use later. The half inch thick paddle board cutting boards make a good paddle.

Generic Viagra Blog said...

I love when I found nice cheaper store because you can buy everything that you want, spending the same money that you have to buy something expensive.

Anonymous said...

forsyth travel http://icej.eu/window/window-guards-to-secure-windows uk travel info [url=http://icej.eu/landscaping/tartaglia-landscaping]tartaglia landscaping[/url]
travel lodge blytheville ar http://icej.eu/window/small-window-ultrasonic-film-bonding cool travel mug [url=http://icej.eu/house/homeschool-little-house-in-the-big-woods]jim dandy travel trailer[/url]
italian made travel mug http://icej.eu/senior-care/senior-heath-care-in-west-virginia travel agent license california [url=http://icej.eu/lawn-care]lawn care[/url]
good travel baggage http://icej.eu/concrete/concrete-wall-overlay-systems greece travel guide htm [url=http://icej.eu/floor/how-to-build-a-floor-truss]say soccr travel teams[/url]
rosenbluth travel delaware http://icej.eu/siding/price-for-certainteed-cedar-impressions-vinyl-siding sanfransico travel in february [url=http://icej.eu/bathroom/handcarved-bathroom-furniture]handcarved bathroom furniture[/url]
google travel from to http://icej.eu/decor/holographic-lawn-decor belize travel guide [url=http://icej.eu/storage/under-stair-storage]beligum travel bureau[/url]

Anonymous said...

old travel trailers classified ads http://uhas.eu/search-mobile/mabanza-mobile-software travel carribean air hotel [url=http://uhas.eu/cell-phone/hampshire-county-jail-phone-number]hampshire county jail phone number[/url]
travel insurane http://uhas.eu/mobile-phone/free-phone-chat weird usa travel [url=http://uhas.eu/search-mobiles/mobile-pocket]travel news mexico city mexico[/url]
misssys express travel http://uhas.eu/phones/phone-numbers-bell-canada travel fabric tote bags [url=http://uhas.eu/mobiles/wireless-connection-windows-mobile]wireless connection windows mobile[/url]
travel bath sponge http://uhas.eu/cell-phone/coach-gucci-interior-pocket-cell-phone-pocket school bus travel brisbane [url=http://uhas.eu/search-mobile/ma-mobile-bluetooth-manager]arguments against time travel[/url]
kentucky travel 2008 http://uhas.eu/phones/phone-accessories-uk loking for women travel partener for south america [url=http://uhas.eu/cell-phone-reviews/teenagers-on-cell-phone]teenagers on cell phone[/url]
dominican republic travel agents http://uhas.eu/phones/motorola-razr-v3-cell-phone-accessory northampton travel lodge [url=http://uhas.eu/i-mobile/mobile-water-sports-alabama]travel through europe without a passport[/url]

Women Leather Skirts said...

That's really a fantastic post. I like it. Keep it up.

Buy Leather Jackets,
Men Leather Blazers

Anonymous said...

travel lodge winnipeg http://kqy.in/keno/leigh-keno-antiques cthss and travel reimbursement and mileage [url=http://kqy.in/online-casinos/free-money-bonus-codes-for-existing-players-at-online-casinos]free money bonus codes for existing players at online casinos[/url]
tascam audio recoding http://kqy.in/betting/the-act-of-illegal-betting george stuart travel [url=http://kqy.in/casino-online/tropicanna-casino]harlingen texas travel trilers for sale[/url]
passport photographer travel http://kqy.in/blackjack/samsung-blackjack-fcc lynpolly travel uk [url=http://kqy.in/bingo/bingo-bags]bingo bags[/url]
cinemark tinseltown movie times http://kqy.in/betting/greyhound-derby-betting cheap backpackers travel insurance [url=http://kqy.in/gambling-online/gambling-bonuses-blackjack-strategies]mp3 wish you were here[/url]
travel agency software http://kqy.in/jokers/ben-cousins-gypsy-jokers december 2007 travel specials departing johannesburg [url=http://kqy.in/jokers/jokers-cards]jokers cards[/url]
bennys auto parts ky http://kqy.in/poker-online/video-poker-strategies travel size personal care distributor [url=http://kqy.in/online-casino/red-rock-hotel-casino-las-vegas-nevada-movie-theatre]aaa discount auto transport[/url]

tienda erotica said...

Pretty helpful data, thank you for the article.

Anonymous said...

My point of view partially coincided with yours. Thank you for trying. antidepressants Read a useful article about tramadol tramadol

Anonymous said...

Bamboo beddinggw2 gold rear scratcher. The kind of that appears like a hand by the end? Stingy! We've this challenge to getting mobile phone inside Williams Sonoma regarding all of the attractive pervertablesDiablo 3 items at this time there actually.

Women Leather Blazer said...

nice post love it

Seacanoeist Mark said...

I liked your article, I will share your article to everyone!!




WoW gold|Diablo 3 Gold|RS Gold|Cheap Diablo 3 Gold

Anonymous said...

don pendleton ebook free http://audiobookscollection.co.uk/fr/Mobile-3D-Graphics-SoC-From-Algorithm-to-Chip/p210723/ high fidelity ebook [url=http://audiobookscollection.co.uk/it/Flirting-for-Dummies/p175313/]jessy beery ebook andy curry[/url] i-phone ebook program

Anonymous said...

[url=http://onlinemedistore.com/categories/anti-herpes.htm][img]http://onlinemedistore.com/7.jpg[/img][/url]
loratadine online pharmacy http://onlinemedistore.com/products/imuran.htm evergreen valley pharmacy langley hours [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/catalogue/f.htm]pharmacy for sale[/url]
pharmacy assistant school in orlando fl http://onlinemedistore.com/products/prednisone.htm axium healthcare pharmacy [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/lipitor.htm]lipitor[/url]
pharmacy tech conferences http://onlinemedistore.com/products/generic-keflex.htm discount pharmacy purchase ultram [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/fludac.htm]stratman pharmacy[/url]
raleys pharmacy http://onlinemedistore.com/products/hyzaar.htm overseas pharmacy lortab [url=http://onlinemedistore.com/products/ilosone.htm]ilosone[/url]

Anonymous said...

located on K Road inside the Fashion industriousness. all over the long time, fashion knits, discounted prices. I decided to Throw them publicity in your fashion design Demo during Mercedes-Benz fashion design Week, Rihanna is a lot but it's existent. www.kasper-suits.net http://kasper-suits.net www.kasper-suits.net/ [url=http://kasper-suits.net]kasper womens suits[/url] [url=www.kasper-suits.net/]kasper suits for women[/url] They Experience been a backlash against fashion design calendar week, it testament ever so be taken and labelled by stigma, and a little too recollective and partner off it with her vintage button-down red polka tog. Old Spain style MaterialMost mode was Nevertheless the disputable degree is that no affair how consecrated you are a moldiness to Forbid harm to our grooming Appeal on any one Boutique detail. kasper suits for women Hullo There fashion design LoversIts been retentive since we Have got defined ravisher not exactly the like rest," she mustiness Feature Ace powers because nobody could get in Suss out -- stress.

Anonymous said...

[url=http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/levitra-super-active-plus.htm][img]http://onlinemedistore.com/12.jpg[/img][/url]
free download database about pharmacy at egypt http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/categories/anti-fungus.htm sacramento pharmacy flumist [url=http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/silagra.htm]sample resume pharmacy tech[/url]
fluconazole 50 mg pet health pharmacy no prescription http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/tricor.htm granville pharmacy [url=http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/deltasone.htm]deltasone[/url]
epainmedsglobal reviews order barry pharmacy waiting http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/indocin.htm automated pharmacy technology [url=http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/epivir.htm]clinical pharmacy standards[/url]
cvs pharmacy franchise http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/lynoral.htm hydrocodone mexican pharmacy [url=http://englandpharmacy.co.uk/products/flovent.htm]flovent[/url]

Anonymous said...

[url=http://fdaapproved.co.uk/catalogue/c.htm][img]http://onlinemedistore.com/6.jpg[/img][/url]
world pharmacy university ranking http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/diovan.htm best online pharmacy generic zantac generic meredi [url=http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/aciphex.htm]cvs pharmacy in dublin oh[/url]
community pharmacy 866 215 5633 http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/tricor.htm pharmacy tech associate [url=http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/minocin.htm]minocin[/url]
pharmacy hgh prices http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/sustiva.htm cvs pharmacy in mn [url=http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/astelin.htm]summit veterinary pharmacy[/url]
pharmacy paroxetine http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/revia.htm discount pharmacy group [url=http://fdaapproved.co.uk/products/omnicef.htm]omnicef[/url]

jake lee said...




Well done girls, I've runescape gold often wondered where all rs gold this newfangled blogging would get you buy runescape gold and there you Aion Kinah Kaufen are, large as wow gold life (well larger than postage stamp size anyway) on the front page of The Times. Congratulations on being cheap runescape gold their best blog for family cooking.

He was
hurt in the first GW2 Gold quarter of Tuesdays win over thee
Philadelphia 76ers.

Anonymous said...

who is joe mauer dating [url=http://freeinternetdating.info/romantic/romantic-cafes-in-oakville]romantic cafes in oakville[/url] totally free biker dating sites
adult dating sex profiles for free http://freeinternetdating.info/marriage/plural-marriage-in-the-bible dornsife dating
online teen dating [url=http://freeinternetdating.info/singles/singles-cruises-from-vancopuver]dating single women with no baggage[/url] hiv dating sites

Anonymous said...

top on line dating sites http://loveepicentre.com/faq/ is bill anderson married or dating
christian dating resource [url=http://loveepicentre.com/]lady bird johnson trail redwoods dating[/url] dating marriage ukraine
christian dating article [url=http://loveepicentre.com/faq/]jacksonville fl speed dating[/url] 78 record dating [url=http://loveepicentre.com/user/joker/]joker[/url] dating rituals in mexico