Linky snippet of the day

From the latest installment of Ellie Lumpesse's fascinating series of masculinity interviews, something many of the readers here probably already knew, but that bears repeating anyway:

I’d never even held a girl’s hand before her, and she’d had a bit of experience, most of it bad. She, like so many women, had been a victim of violent sexual abuse as a child. I knew only that I wanted to protect her, to make her feel safe, to see her really smile now and again. She wanted me to slap her around, call her names, and facefuck her. At first, I was repulsed — mostly by the cognitive dissonance caused by wanting to give her what she wanted, and having based most of my personality around the role of guardian. I’ll get back to this in answering the other questions.

I quote this here because, as I said over there:

I’m glad to see someone talking about how his partner asked him to get into BDSM/rough sex. All too often people make the bizarre assumption that men pressure, cajole, or force women into “porn sex,” when it’s very common for tops/sexually dominant people/etc to be made, not born. :)